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Thursday, 25 February 2010

In pursuit of utopia

Many a time we say we’re waiting for Mr Right or looking for Miss Right
But just the other day I asked myself- I want the perfect partner but what about me?
Will I be their perfect partner?
Do I measure up to the profile that I’m demanding or wishing for?
Am I not expecting someone else to be better at what I myself know will not be able to achieve?
Bottom line is - are we realistic in our dreams and hopes of our partner for life
Never get me wrong here! I’m not saying settle for anything but take time to know that “love lets us view imperfections as tolerable if not adorable”
There’s a quote attributed to Mother Theresa “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”

I’ve come to realise that some of the many scenes that we see on the wide screen as regards relationships are not that far fetched
Maybe the end has too much syrup to make the picture perfect, but the underlying relationships mirror what actually happens day to day
I was watching “The family that preys” and it got me thinking
(I’m now in love with the song I hope you dance)
Just how many women out there wish they had a better man than the one they actually have?
How many secretly wish their hubby was like the man they work with
I guess it’s to do with not accepting the fact that what’s on our plate is all you have
What’s on the plate next to you is not yours, and fro relationships you cannot get any left overs from there
Be satisfied with what’s in front of you
After all, you served yourself at the buffet
I don’t know why people expect their partners to change into what they want
Why not just look for the person with all that you’ll need?
There’s no guarantee they will change into what you desire coz what they are is IT
They’re the final thing
Try as you might to hint that they ought to carry themselves that way
They ought to change the way they do things
They ought to have more passion for life
Chances are they’ll only tolerate you for a while and settle down to whom they are
And then the infidelity begins
You see someone else as what you desire and you ensure they’re for the taking
Work is the place that most relationships blossom much
Why?
You spend so much time with these guys
You end up seeing them as the ideal person there ought to be
When you get home you see someone else
You see the person who still hasn’t changed into what you want
And you start drawing away
Gradually things fall apart
I pray for my future hubby coz I’ve seen it ain’t easy
Those around you influence you to some extent whether we like to acknowledge it or not
Don’t agree?
Rewind at what you blurted out the last time you had an argument with someone close –even a friend or a relative
You said things that you believed stayed in your subconscious but becoz they’d ticked you off bid time it came out
You never meant to say it coz it’d hurt them but it came out - some how- involuntarily
We all have our flaws
Ponder this - Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

The fact that you can accept your imperfections is a key to accepting your future hubby’s imperfections. People don’t change because there are married I also agree.Girls have dream boys ,and boys have dream girls.But your married mentor may see you as the dream girl he did not get the chance to marry. You as well might have found him to be the dream boy you never came across but the guy is married and is your mentor.I know a single lady can be close friends with his married mentor without anything we woluldn’t want to talk about happening. That dream boy and dream girl mentality will make you click without you ever thinking about doing anything we wouldn’t want to talk about.Cristian principle are guide so nothing will ever happen.
But since you’ll be a future wife.just imagine if you are in a situation where you are in front of the bullet not behind the trigger.what goes around comes around.just imagine you husband is now friends with a single ,drop-dead gorgeous girl with masters.everytime this girl has to drop your hubby home from work because at the time your hubby’s car is being panel beaten.will you take it lightly and say nothing.since you know your hubby is ethical ,you won’t be a bit jealouse or you ‘ll just wait and see no evil,hear no evil ,talk no evil.since wisdom comes with age or not with age .ponder over this situation where you’re in front of the bullet not behind the trigger.like you said you’re wise beyond your age.this is not personnal but it’s an issue with relationships so I had to give this scenario so that you can grasp the realistic picture of relationships please don’t despise over the example I’m not accusing you of anything.

I quote

"A moment's insight is sometimes worth a life's experience." - Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.


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